Are you kidding me? Politico has an update(included in the previous link), stating the Governor's spokesman said Sanford was hiking in the Appalachians, presumably far, far away from the stench of this total-pile-of-horse-shit excuse. To those without Sanford's history, hiking in the mountains and writing a book or article (according to the First Lady, "to write something.." -- a much too general statement, implying the First Lady to Really Does Not Know what her husband is up to? Also, as pointed out here, Family Man Sanford's going to leave his wife and family to hike and write on Father's Day Weekend? ), might work if you completely ignore the fact he's suing the Federal Government over being forced to accept Stimulus money! And that he filed the necessary papers the day before he disappeared? Whatever the real reason is(and we might not ever know..), the excuse doesn't fly at all, period.
Some other possibilities:
*Vice - (Outside shot, not likely, although yet another Republican morals scandal would be sweet)
*Republican party strategery - (More likely, as he's the visible point man on a judicial attack on Obama's policies for the coming months, he will continue to gain visibility in the coming months and years. If the Republican gamble of saying "No" to the Stimulus succeeds and the Democrats fail miserably, he could be The Man in 2012. A Sanford/Palin ticket is a creepy-ass prospect, indeed.. )
*South Carolina strategery(and yeah, this is a strategy/treachery combo word. I like it, but didn't make it up..) - (Possible, but not likely. Sanford and his Lt. Governor don't like each other (to put it mildly), but Sanford's out of office in 2010, and it doesn't seem like he should care that much to go scheming out of state.)
*NWO treachery - (Fomenting civil discontent and federal destabilization--maybe.)
*Anti-NWO treachery - (Fomenting civil discontent and federal destabilization--maybe.)
*He's really a spy. - (Again, maybe. For who or what, I don't know. Governmental back channel organization is a structure with which I'm not familiar. But there were these quotes: "Neither the governor’s office nor the State Law Enforcement Division, which provides security for governors, has been able to reach Sanford after he left the mansion in a black SLED Suburban SUV, said Sen. Jake Knotts and three others familiar with the situation but who declined to be identified.
Sanford’s last known whereabouts were near Atlanta, where a mobile telephone tower picked up a signal from his phone, authorities said.")
And
"Chief Lloyd confirmed that my information is legitimate," Knotts said in a statement released early in the afternoon. "He shared my concerns" about succession of power in Sanford’s absence, the Lexington Republican said.
"I was recently made aware that Governor Sanford has frequently been eluding SLED agents and disappearing at odd times," Knotts said.
"As the head of our state, in the unfortunate event of a state of emergency or homeland security situation, Governor Sanford should be available at all times to the chief of SLED," the senator said."
*He's really Jack Bauer. - (Not likely, but that's not to say that maybe Sanford fantasizes he's Jack Bauer. It seems to be a consistent fantasy scenario favorite for Republicans everywhere, so why should the Governor be any different? Dovetails nicely with "Being kidnapped by terrorists/being tortured for information regarding Myrtle Beach.")
*Murdered; Replaced by a clone or robot - (Not likely, but if Sanford returns, holds a press conference, and keeps repeating "everything is fine, guhhhhhhhhhh, everything is fine, guhhhhhhhhhhh," then we'll re-visit this thought. Nice visual though, right?)
More scenarios from godlike. All this intrigue, and not a peep from any major media outlet. I wonder what that means..
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