More Bath Salts Madness - Naked Zombies Everywhere

I still don't think this is bath salts.  There might be a few instances of bath salts actually being the cause, but the root cause is something else.  This article is the first one I've found that directly links bath salts with this violent variant of cannibalism.  The aggressor has admitted to being on bath salts, so this might be the first one yet!  Opposing Views:

Police in Gwinnett County, Georgia say that 21-year-old Karl Laventure, who admitted to being high on bath salts, had super-human strength and threatened to eat them [and customers] at a golf driving range last month.



Officer Ross Hancock told WSB-TV that Laventure was half naked, running through a pond and threatening customers at the range with a golf club when he arrived.


Officer Hancock recalled that a blast of pepper spray didn’t seem to phase Laventure: “He didn’t even wipe his eyes, he just kept them open."


It took four shocks with a taser to get Laventure to the ground. But before it was all over, Laventure received a total of 14 taser jolts.


Disturbing video released by authorities shows Laventure being pinned to the ground and mumbling incoherently: “I’m'a eat you. Four Four. Oh God. Don’t make me eat you.”

Officer Hancock said: “He was still talking gibberish, still cussing, still saying he wanted to eat us, eat other people."

'Bath salts' have been suspected in a number of zombie-like attacks in recent months.

Mephedrone, the active ingredient in bath salts, is a synthetic stimulant that users say makes them feel energized and confident. At toxic levels, the drug reportedly causes intense confusion and sometimes violent rage, spikes in body temperature and hallucinations.

And yet this is the first(possibly) confirmation that yes, this might actually be bath salt related.  If indeed Laventure really did admit to being on them..  This still sounds like..  Something Else to me.  Something Else.

These attacks have added a big dose of the sensational to the 24 hour news cycle spicing up both crime and human interest segments, yeah?  Daily Life in 2012 now includes the possibility some random person you encounter could, for whatever reason, snap and try to eat you. 

Why not?  Fukushima happened.  Why not zombies?  Aliens?  Bring it, spacemen..  Change is occurring faster than we can process it.   McKenna would be pleased with this level of manifesting novelty, don't you think?

File Under: "..Goes Without Saying.."

The tag line from Fark:  (Emphasis mine)

"If you're high on hallucinogens and invisible shadow men start to annoy you, don't use a lighter and a spray can to defend yourself." 

Headline:  Hallucinating men start fire, jump from second-story window, authorities say  Excerpts:

Two men on drugs hallucinated that they were being attacked and jumped from a second-story window late Monday after starting a fire to fight off the attacker, authorities said.



The men used a lighter and a spray can as a blow torch to defend themselves about 11 p.m. inside their apartment at Mohawk Manor, 3640 N. Birmingham Ave., but accidentally burned some clothes and then jumped to escape the fire, Fire Department spokesman Stan May said.
May said the men appeared to be "really high" and were scuffed up by the fall but were expected to be fine.

I'd like to hear what these guys saw that led to said hi jinx.  A lighter and spray can?  Very Die Hard-ish.  I'm guessing they didn't have guns.  Or they weren't that high/way, way too high to use them.  This could have gone from Jackass-level hilarity to tragic quite easily. 

They really caught a break with the whole second-story-window-thing, huh?